Time as an Element of Beauty (Podcast #55)

My heart is overflowing today with God’s goodness. I have been looking back and reflecting on the last nine months, how he has brought me through so much that seemed impossible. While I have been sitting and feeding the baby, I have been reading over things I’ve written over the last nine months–my journals, weekly…

Cast Your Cares (Podcast #53)

Today’s episode is for anyone who wakes up in the middle of the night with questions that don’t have answers. If you are struggling with fears of what might happen, or wrestling with thoughts of if only things had happened differently, pull up a chair and let’s talk about finding God in this moment, the…

Birth, Motherhood, and Wholehearted Surrender (Podcast #32)

I have written a lot about birth on this blog. God has used it like nothing else in my life as a metaphor for wholehearted surrender. In today’s podcast, I share a bit about birth, about surrendering hopes, surrendering regrets, surrendering fears, and ultimately surrendering our whole hearts to God. I hope this is an…

The Memory and Promise of Light

There are moments, in the middle of the night, when the electricity of current events sends a shockwave through my sleeping body and wakes me, wide-eyed and shaken. What is going to happen to this broken world? I see myself, gathering my children around me like the mother in a fairy tale, walking into a…

Helpless (When Faith Trembles)

Helpless. The word rose up out of my mind and offered itself to me in the middle of a dark night. I held a feverish child in my arms, watched his labored breathing, imagined the flickering candle of his precious little life before my eyes. My mind traveled farther than I meant it to go,…

It’s Going to Be Okay

Sometimes I travel through time. Usually in the middle of the night, when I am awake with babies on either side of me, not daring to move lest I wake them and lose the few precious moments I have in my life to let my thoughts flow without interruption. During the days, the needs take…

Hope for a Heavy Heart (Podcast #18)

I have had so much going on in my heart and mind. I find myself waking in the middle of the night feeling shaken by the state of the world in which we are living and raising our children. I have very little quiet in my life to process through this right now, so forgive…

Thoughts on the Pandemic

Hello, my name is Mackenzie Chester. I am the mother of eight young children, and I am humbly asking you to please stop the spread of this virus. For the ones who cannot fight it off on their own, I am asking you to please do whatever you can for the weak. We are in…

Hope on the Inhale

hope on the inhaleafter the gut-punchthe diagnosis, bleak prognosislook into the mirrorbut your eyes can’t focuson any beauty but what’s lost hopeon the inhalein the breaking of headlinesthat beat on the shoreline, the rising of feartidesthat pull you back into despair hopeon the inhaleafter the deep sighafter the long cryafter the fists-raised-why hopeon the inhaleafter…

I Stand in This Breath of My Life

I am alive. I’m trying to let that sink in. I inherited the unfinished sketchbook of a beloved art professor who passed away last spring. Flipping through the pages this morning, I see how alike we are in our interactions with the blank pages–line drawings, quotation marks surrounding deep theological ideas and questions, to-do lists,…

The Space Between Here and a Miracle (Podcast Episode #4)

You can also listen and subscribe to this podcast on iTunes or Stitcher. For anyone who is waiting on God to answer prayers for a way forward… Anyone who is at the end of their own resources… Anyone who, like me, needs a boost of faith this morning… Today I am reminding myself of God’s…