This Morning I Sat Down at the Table With My 22-Year Old Self

This morning I sat down at the table with my 22-year old self.  She drank ginger peach black tea with cream and sugar.  I drank darjeeling, black.  We met in a cafe, the kind with classical music and the pleasant hum of conversation in the background.  The people sitting next to us wondered if we…

Buying a House is Like Having a Baby

The process of buying a house is remarkably like the stages of labor. Step 1: It’s Time.  This is the exciting moment when you realize you are actually going to have a house.  You are going to get to see the home you have only been dreaming about for so long.  You know that you…

Family and Flexible Vision

I wish that I could find a (nonexistent) journal entry from back when I was in college where I said something like: “Ten years from now, I can see myself…”  And then I described the vision of my life.  The vision I had before marriage, before kids.  Wow. That would be good for a laugh….

Found Object Nativity Scene: Creative Family Advent Day 1

This was a really sweet project.  I told the kids we were going to make a Nativity Scene from found objects.  We bundled up, went out, and started gathering materials.  The picture I had in my head originally is drastically different than our finished product, but I am sooooo happy with the way it came…

The Reason I Write

I wash the dishes a lot. (((When I say a lot, I may mean world record.))) Lately I have been listening to podcasts while I clean the kitchen, and I cannot tell you how happy I am to be in a season where my mind is really awake, and I am learning new things.  It…

This Is Not Working

This is not working. I say that all the time. The baby won’t stay in her bed.  This laundry pile stretches out infinitely from prehistoric past to all predictions of the future.  We are outgrowing the kitchen table, which is the biggest table we can fit in the kitchen.  Cat in the house.  Math.  Bedtime…

Having Children: A Spiritual Journey

Over the last few weeks, I have been rereading old blog posts and speculating about my life.  The past year has been both incredibly sweet and difficult, trying to balance daily life with six young children with all the demands of three meals a day, the never-ending laundry, growing a home business, homeschool, planning for…

Unfolding

It is such a mercy that life unfolds before us.  Ten years ago, if I had seen a photograph of my future-self this morning, driving along in a 15-passenger van with six children ages nine and under, I would have asked what any other stranger wants to know: Are they all mine?! And the answer…

Waiting on Azalea Jane, a birth story

I am writing this weeks after Azalea was born, and it reminds me of the way you feel the next morning after waking up from a nightmare.  In the middle of the night, a dream can feel so terrifying.  Your heart is pounding.  You felt that it was so real.  The next morning, when you…

The Best Day of My Life

Tomorrow is my due date.  I can hardly believe that in a few short hours or days, the secret face of this child will be revealed, and we will be holding her in our arms.  God has done a huge miracle in my life to make me brave for this day.  I wrote in my…

Moving Through Fear

  I am in the second trimester of my sixth pregnancy.  This is really happening.  This is set in motion.  In a few short months, this pregnancy will end in labor, delivery, and the prize of all prizes–another sweet baby in our family. People literally say to me all the time, regarding birth, “Oh, you’re…

Slow Work

God is doing a slow work in me.   So many days it feels like nothing is happening.   Like my life, which once seemed so useful and productive, is making zero impact on the world.  The days when life was defined by an impressive string of accomplishments are lost somewhere at the bottom of the laundry…